weird analogies

i've finally found someone with a greater penchant than me for analogies.. and really weird ones too.. :p

this morning, we heard a speech by an ex-Vice Principal of the school i am currently attached to for my one week "School Experience" (where we are supposed to get a feel of "reality" by observing real teachers in action and real students in "inaction"..) i shall avoid naming the school for fear of accidental offense .... i mean, you never know, right? besides, it's irrelevant to the story..

anyway, in a short speech of no more than half an hour, the straight-faced but very funny ex-VP told the students how they should not be one of the following 4 "things":

(a) a cabbage: a cabbage just sits there, in total inactivity, just like students who do not like to participate in physical activities and sports. These students start to "get wide at the equator and narrow at the poles". they have an absence of what we call the "waistline".. He said, matter-of-factly: "Girls, these are not people anymore. They are cabbages." we burst into fits of laughter.. the best part is, he didn't even blink when he said that!

(b) a sponge: another inactive creature, except this was more in the "mental" sense. sponges sit there, not contributing to the class. they just "suck and suck everything the teacher says" and then, when exams come about, they "just squeeze everything out".. - basically, these students are "brainless"..

(c) a coral: according to him, this type of student is even worse.. corals sit there, doing absolutely nothing. they do not even absorb. just sit there, pretty. one fine day, the "dynamite will come along and just blow them apart".. :O durrhhhh???? i think a lot of us sat there, pondering on what he was talking about.. and decided in the end it was just really funny..

(d) a jellyfish: but the worst of all?? jellyfishes are students who just float around lost and in their own existences, until they meet someone else along the way, like teachers and other students, and irritate them. they otherwise do nothing else.. their entire existence is to go around "irritating other people"..

hahahahaha...

that's one thing i've learnt about teachers.. a lot of them have the ability to make the most amazingly sharp and witty but non-sacarstic jokes about their students.. hahaha..